Unexamined Assumptions:
A radical shift in how you evaluate your life
Every once in a while you hear words put together in a way that alter your life so that you can never look at it the same way again. This is what happened when I heard the phrase, "unexamined assumptions" during the Pachamama Symposium at the HUB conference two weekends ago in Los Angeles that I mentioned before. The concept was so fascinating to me that I wanted to share it with you.
For decades I have spent a lot of time evaluating what things were important to me about life and why. I do this, I think, because in my 20s I realized that I, along with many others, had a different definition of the rules and laws that a society lives by, and in particular, OUR society.
You see, I have always felt that rules and laws are just someone else's opinion of what my behavior should look like. Even in my 20s, I made up my own rules and seemed to be happier and more content than many people I met.
Those of you who know me, know that I question everything and I'm sure part of this is due to my evaluating things based on my own set of rules. I invite teens in my camps to begin questioning everything as well. This is how we create leaders and not a country full of 'sheeples' as I heard one person call us lately.
I suggest that the kids question what they are learning. Question why they are learning it. Question what others tell them they should do, respectfully, of course. Question what makes them tick, why they want this or that, and lately, question if going to college is really necessary or the right thing to do right after high school, especially if they have to borrow money to do so.
You get the idea.
Why do I do this? Because it's too often that I find human beings living on autopilot and often unhappily so. Living lives that someone else suggested they live instead of making up their own lives. And too often I find that these lives are based on lifestyles that beckon that debt that is plaguing our country and other countries now.
So in comes this idea of "unexamined assumptions" and viola', I now have a phrase that describes, in perfect detail, how I have lived and evaluated much of my life. And I continue to do so on a daily basis, because if I do not, I may find myself doing something I'd rather not be doing or living somewhere I'd rather not be living or in a relationship with someone I'd rather not be relationshiping with!
Do you know what I mean? I would venture you do.
Here's some assumptions Americans make that I'm not sure serve us, or the planet:
• We should all have our own car and drive around whenever we feel like it.
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We all have to have a lawnmower to call our own (or shovel or full set of tools).
• That the effect of our lifestyle choices is confined to our local area.
• That schools have our children's best interests at heart.
• That kids need cell phones.
• That it's OK to throw something away (where is 'away' anyway?) just this once.
• That we all have to have our own house and live alone, separate from others.
• That when we recycle, we've done all we can do.
• That in order to be successful, you have to own a house, have 2 kids, a dog, a cat, two goldfish, drive a nice car, work outside the home, own a cell phone and a BBQ and have all matching appliances and on and on an on.
So many of our choices are based on these unexamined assumptions and then, later on, we often question why we aren't happy or fulfilled or successful.
What if we actually examined these assumptions and then made up our own rules?
What if we really examined the true cost of accepting these assumptions as true?
What if we teach our kids that they, too, can make up THEIR own rules? I love this idea and share it with kids whenever I can. And the funny thing? They love the idea also.
So my suggestion to you is this. Spend a few minutes by yourself, or with your family or a group of friends or co-workers and starting coming up with a list of your own. If you really start digging, you may be astounded at what you come up with.
Once you have your initial list of assumptions, contemplate it and keep adding to it. You may find that the life you've created, and the money you think you need to support it (which is my point by the way), is mostly or entirely based on one or several of these unexamined assumptions about life and what it should, could, must, or have to look like if you're going to be happy, fulfilled, satisfied, etc.
And if you find, like many people I coach, that your life isn't based on the assumptions you'd rather be making up for yourself, change them. And never stop questioning why you do the things you do and why your choose the things you choose. When you live this way you start to live on purpose and that's when you really begin to find happiness. At least that's how it's always worked for me.
What are your assumptions? Email them to me if you want to share. |
Elisabeth Donati (aka Miss E) is CEO of Creative Wealth Intl., LLC, a company devoted to empowering individuals of all ages with the tools and information they need to be responsible for themselves and the world. 
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